Posts Tagged ‘Kitty Cobbler’

Billy Ray: Trial by Fire?

Poor Billy Ray.. his Friday concert in Hesperia, CA, was called off due to a fire that broke out. Just because he can’t get anyone to pay to see him.. *hack.. cough.. twitch..  I mean, it was a “free” concert for charity, so lots of people will be very sad they won’t get to hear his amazing vocals *more coughing and twitching* I mean relieved that they won’t have to torture their ears.. (oh.. wait, I think I did that backwards..)

Got any good dirt? Email me! Kitty@countrymusictattletale.com

Miley has a Malfunction

We all know that Miley is good and pure. She is a sweet flower, who I would never dream of making fun of. Not like “Certain” country cross over.. who shall remain nick nameless. Okay, just kidding, Miley is definitely going the way of Lindsay Lohan and Trampica Simpson. (oops, I guess she won’t remain nameless) anyway, as I have been getting lots of flack for targeting Trampica, I thought I should take a break and target someone else. So here is a picture of Miley, my sweet innocent virgin who just make wardrobe mistake. I can see how it would happen. I often leave the house with out my underwear. Or a shirt. Disney kids, gotta love the morals they set for our kids. Peak early, then skank it up all the way down. That’s what my Granny Cobbler always said. Of course, she was under more sailors than a nautical toilet…

Props to BabyGrl for being a supreme Tattler!

Gotta and good dirt? Wanna share? Just want to trash busty blonde wannabes? Email me at KittyCobbler@live.com

Trampy and Greedy.. and thats just Joe..

While I don’t agree with putting someone down, (even Trampicca simpleton) for issues involving weight, I do believe in giving them a verbal thrashing for being selfish and greedy. Although when it comes to Trampica and her creepy dad, I have to say I am hardly surprised.

In recent news, it was revealed to us that Jessica is being sued for 10 million dollars. Why? She was apparently contracted to shoot a fitness video in 2005, and never followed through. Bet she is sorry now. (Here she is with a career sinking faster than the Titanic, and she could have been the next Tammy Faye absolot!) Alex Astilean, owner of said fitness company, reveals that he originally offered to pay both Nick and Jessica 1 million to do a video together. But but greedy daddy Joe decided that a half a million wasn’t enough for his precious twins.. I mean Jessica’s boobs.. I mean Jessica his beloved daughter, and told the company that Jessica would do the video solo for 1 million.

Alex Astilean said he doesn’t even know if Nick knew about the offer. He said:

“We knew that Joe Simpson gets the percentage just from Jessica’s work . . .We felt sorry for what we did by accepting the final offer, but we were in such a rush to come out with the video. For Joe to screw his own son in law for half a million dollars was still not enough, nor was the money from Jessica’s side, because he wanted another Ferrari and was trying to get Jessica’s trainer into the picture and force me to teach him the SpeedFit Routine.”

Well, Nick may never have been good enough, but I guess Jessica’s trainer, Mike Alexander, who just happened to also be represented by sicko Joe, was. Joe was insistent that he also wanted Mike on the video, (for additional money, of course.) And Astilean refusal to hire Alex is where things started to go wrong. Even after Jessica shot the video, and got paid, she just so happened to forget to give her final approval for the video. (so the video could never be released.) Slimy greedy, and sad, sad, sad. Now Mr. Astilean had an exercise video he is going to have to pay even more people for. Pay them to watch it, that is.

Astilean also added:

“What diabolic minds they had to shoot an exercise video for people to lose weight, but to never think about the millions of fat people who needed this video, knowing the entire time that this video would never be released. We are now in 2009 and they have dragged this out for so long they ruined the SpeedFit Company and put it in the worst financial crisis. All the assets we had vanished, we cannot afford a lawyer to litigate with them and they got me at the point where they want me to be, broke. All I was trying to do is make this country skinny.”

I don’t know about all that, but I do say that what goes around, comes around. Pretty soon Trampica and her big creepy daddy are going to be such losers they can’t even get on celebrity fit club.. oh.. wait.. I think that’s already happened..

Got some juicy gossip? just plain hate Trampica and her skeezy daddy Joe? Email me at KittyCobbler@live.com

*this blog has been edited because I don’t have actual proof of Trampica’s umm.. love life.. So Trampica it is!

Taylor is Smart AND Affordable!

Or, at least her new clothing line will be! Taylor Swift has just announced that she has teamed up with L.E.I, which is a brand carried by Walmart, to make a like of dresses to roll out this summer! Now, I have been to my share of concerts a la Taylor Swift, and if the swarms of adolescent girls in cowboy boots is any indication, these dresses will sell like hot cakes. An added plus? Someone in the spotlight is getting attention, and clothing deals because she IS NOT a slut! Finally! The best part is that, even though in my humble opinion, Taylor could probably design far more expensive clothes and they would still sell out, her dresses are said to be going for a mere 14$! Woo hoo for not getting greedy! Just another reason why we love you Taylor!

When asked why they approached Taylor, group chief executive officer, Jack Gross said it was because she is:

“someone with a good reputation and someone who we didn’t have to be afraid of getting any sort of bad press.” He added, “She is so famous, but really so grounded. We liked her immediately.”

When questioned about the topic of how the dresses were designed, Taylor said,

“We had so many ideas to work from, and it came down to creating dresses that I would wear. If I couldn’t see myself wearing them, I wasn’t interested in making them. It was very important for me to create cute, affordable dresses. Especially in these hard times, making expensive dresses just doesn’t make any sense. I go to Wal-Mart all the time. The one in my hometown of Hendersonville, Tenn., is open 24 hours, so I go there a lot to buy DVDs and stuff like that.”

Don’t you just want to give her a big, fat, TV mom hug and tell her she is free to go to the malt shop after school? If Kitty could knit, Taylor, I would totally send you a pink afgan with a fluffy kitty embroidered on it!

Got any good news? Want to share? Email me at KittyCobbler@live.com

Psss… Miley.. There are Other People in the world Besides You!!

I know, I know, I was shocked too..

In an interview with J-14 Magazine, Miley Cyrus forgot (again) that there just might be people out there more important than here.  (I know, I know, it is shocking Miley. I mean, how could you have known? This has probably never happened to you before. I mean,  imagine that! People more famous, popular, or politically influential than Miley Cyrus! I Think the Earth just stopped turning!) In the interview, when asked what it was like to perform for Barack Obama’s daughters, Sasha, and Malia, she (accidentally I’m sure) turned it around to herself. (silly Miley).  She said:

“They [Sasha and Malia] were taking pictures like every other fan – they were really cool and appreciative of me being there. I really liked that.”

Then Miley proceeded to go into the oval office and put her feet up on Baracks Desk. When Security came, she said, “dont worry guys, Im fine.. Just brink me some chicken and my butt  boy Justin..”

Got any juicy gossip? Wanna share? (like parenthacies?)  Email me at KiityCobbler@live.com

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